Catching some shut eye

John Titchen's Blog - Thu, 2015-05-28 11:11

The physical self defence and karate tactics I teach are predominantly close range. While I do teach some longer range approaches, my emphasis on tactile strategies reflects the reality that even when space is available, the majority of non consensual violent confrontations begin, proceed and end at close range regardless of any training to maintain distance.

As a general rule the close proximity of what I teach results in having between one to four tactile points of contact on a person at any given time during a drill. To begin with this can be unnerving for students (even experienced cross-training black belts) who are used to learning by watching a drill and relying on visual cues at longer ranges to function in alive training.

Your eyes can deceive you, don’t trust them.

Unlike Obi-Wan Kenobi I’m not advocating that you let go your conscious self and act on instinct.

That comes later.

What I do suggest to my students is that once they are in tactile contact their eyes are not the optimum source of information, particularly if they are manipulating the other person’s posture (or preventing the other person from manipulating their posture) while looking to strike to control, or control to strike. Once in contact with another person, especially if we are touching both above and below the centre of gravity, we receive tactile information on the success of our actions and the other person’s intentions through our skin far quicker and with greater accuracy than our eyes (even when wearing clothing). This information hovers on the edge of our consciousness. If we don’t pay attention to it or cannot recognise it, then we don’t benefit from it and our skill development suffers as a result.

This is where in training we should give our eyes a rest, shut them, and concentrate on what we are feeling. Working with the eyes shut focuses the mind on the tactile cues that we often ignore, leading quickly to greater skill development and enhanced reaction time.

The benefits of ‘blind’ training are not just limited to the tactile arena. I have found that asking students to shield against haymaker attacks to the head with their eyes shut corrects all the little gaps that had been pointed out previously (and ignored) in sighted training. The more vulnerable feeling student automatically adjusts arms and posture to maximise protection to the head rather than watching for the punch and relying on their identification of telegraphs and reaction time to protect them.

The more training you do with your eyes shut the more attuned you become to both your position and posture and that of the other person. This results in faster responses to movement and unconsciously adopting more appropriate posture. Freed from trying to focus on stimuli that the body can read better, the eyes become more attuned to identifying information that is of use.

The more proficient you are at reading visual and tactile cues, the more appropriate and unconscious your reactions and pre-emptions will seem. To an external observer such ‘instinctive’ responses and sustained success may seem like luck.

In my experience there’s no such thing as luck.


Convergence

Rory Miller's Blog - Thu, 2015-05-21 16:39
25 hours (about) into the 40 hour Core Dump in Edmonton. It's going well, and the entire Canada trip deserves an AAR. We've covered some new stuff and some core stuff in new ways. It's working, but it's not "a" thing that's working. It's a convergence of a bunch of different things-- attitudes, philosophy, understanding-- that make it possible. As always, there's more going on than I can see clearly, but here are some of the things.

Philosophy. Nothing about survival or self-protection or self-defense or whatever you want to call it is difficult or unnatural. This is exactly the problem we were evolved to solve. Not being a victim is part of our deepest wiring. Mind, body and spirit have all the tools. This is not about forging warriors, this is about rehabilitating predators.
I can corroborate that eight ways from Sunday, as my dad used to say. Talk to any cop or bouncer who has ever had to fight an untrained woman for real and ask if they want to repeat the experience. Read Strong on Defense and look at what the survivors did and the mindset they tapped into.
 That's for me. But the students have to hear it too, and further, they have to be told a really ugly truth: Almost all of society is set up to perpetually brainwash them so that they never remember their own power.

The physical part isn't hard. It's breaking that damn social conditioning. Seriously, have you ever seen anyone keep fighting after a cupped-hand slap to the ear?  And how long does it take to master that? I've heard of one who kept going after a throat chop. Other strikes are far less reliable, but there is a solid core of 'A' techniques. And even if there wasn't, there are these handy things called "tools". Breaking people is not hard. Our ancestors solved that problem before they were even human.
Rephrase. It's not physically hard. But the social conditioning gets in the way. Almost every officer I've debriefed who got hurt knew exactly what he needed to do, but somehow couldn't make himself act. And that's not even taking into account fear, surprise, or the fact that the bad guy will do his best to psychologically control the victims so they don't fight back.
That is the hard part.

Understanding that most teaching methods work the wrong parts of the brain. Memory, rote, names and labels and techniques mean jack shit in chaos. Technique-based training is the easiest-- for the teacher. And for administrators who need "measurable." But it is possibly the worst possible way to teach people about chaos. Teaching, training, conditioning and play. Four ways to get things into a student's mind and body. Each has a time and place, but each is also useless in other areas.

(And that might be a nice article-- designing drills. Knowing the purpose; knowing which of the four methods are appropriate; checking for pollution e.g. thinking you're using operant conditioning but critiquing turns it into training; and means testing to see if it worked.)

Understanding the problem, obviously. If you don't know attacks, you can't teach SD. Just like you can't teach medicine if you don't know disease and injury. Want to know one of my red flags? If someone shows me what they do and it's clearly based on sparring timing, distance and orientation, then they're just fantasizing.

The partners need training as well. The attacks have to be attacks. You have to be able to project the physical and emotional intensity of grabbing a woman by the throat and slamming her into the wall. Those are the physics she must learn to deal with. That is a taste of the emotional environment in which she will have to deal with those physics. You have a responsibility to be a good bad guy for your partner.

And training tip of the week (or subtle student manipulation, if you want to look at it like that): "You must give your partners good attacks. I know that you're good people and it's hard for you. But if you attack them weak, or slow, or gently, you are literally endangering their lives. Do you want your partner to get hurt because you were so self-conscious you couldn't help her prepare?"
What's subtle about it? The reps of acting ferocious combined with the idea that you are being ferocious for the benefit of someone else will likely also make it easier to slip the leash if you need to for real.

Clear goals. Martial artists try to adapt martial arts to self-defense and usually think of the physical part as just fighting very hard. And fighting has almost nothing to do with it.

Avoidance is best, obviously. Not being chosen as a target, not being isolated if you do get chosen, not allowing yourself to be psychologically controlled. If it goes hands on, well... who would you take out? And how? Shoving down an old lady on a walker and going through her purse? Slamming a drunk tourist's head into the pipe above the urinal? There's almost nothing in the "fight" paradigm for the kinds of attacks that happen. It's a qualitatively different problem. Using the medicine analogy, it's like using a four-week antibiotics regimen for a severed femoral artery. Pre-hospital trauma care is a different skill than fighting disease.

If you know the problem, you can clarify the goals. When it must go hands on, the only sensible options are escape, disable, or control-- and control pretty much only applies to people who have a duty to act and take people into custody. The body mechanics, as well as the mindsets, are very dissimilar between those three. And all are different from fighting. And, for martial artists, that's the second biggest challenge. For most people, the big challenge is getting them to slip the leash and go hands on at all. For martial artists, it's fighting their urge to stand and fight. To get to their preferred distance and orientation and have a duel.
Clarifying the goal, working the body mechanics of escape, for instance, makes the skills pretty easy to get down. But the emotional, social and mental parts are still hard.

DON'T JUST STAND THERE

Ron Goin's Blog - Tue, 2015-05-05 14:28
DON'T JUST STAND THEREDo Something
Everybody does it.  I've done it.  You've probably done it too.  Even if you haven't done it yourself, you've probably seen it done.

You know what I'm talking about...the dreaded martial arts self defense demonstration.

In case you've just emerged from your hermit's cave and don't have a clue what I'm talking about, I'll describe it for you:

One guy, let's call him "Our Hero", stands facing 2 or more bad guys.  The bad guys move in usually with a single a punch, a solitary kick, or an exaggerated grab.  In Aikido, 9 times out of 10, it's a karate chop.

Our hero then responds with the three P's:  poise, power and precision.

The bad guys usually just stand there like a statue, getting pommeled and beaten until finally the coup de grâce finishes them off.  Sometimes they will move in one at a time, but occasionally they'll enter en masse and our hero has to add some balletic turns and spins. 

All of this is done in a school auditorium or at a strip mall.

These demonstrations are pre-planned, pre-arranged, and highly choreographed.  When we watch pro wrestling we always complain about the lack of realism, calling it fake, but when we watch a self defense demo doing essentially the same durned thing we respond with applause.

Let me just say, I hate this crap.  It is unrealistic.  It doesn't show the necessity of running and moving.  It doesn't bring in the necessary elements of cheating and dirty fighting.  Bad guys don't wait their turn.  The attack is probably not even going to be coming from the front, or what I call the Full Monty (full frontal attack).  Bad guys don't follow our rules and are not interested in etiquette or fair play.  Attacks are ambushes.  Attacks are sucker punches.  Attacks have the element of surprise.  Attacks give the tactical advantage to the bad guys.  They are unexpected, unprovoked, and unwarranted.

The neat, precise self defense demo may be beautiful to watch, but that's sort of my point...real world violence is anything but.  It's ugly.  It's messy.  It's noisy.  It's bloody, chaotic and sweaty.

It's the CSI dissection, done in a clean, germ-free science lab.  It's all too sterile.

Watch a real fight, and you'll see what I'm talking about. 

My recommendation?  Forget these types of demos.  Don't include them in your curriculum.  Don't even encourage them in your belt/rank testing.  Forget rote memory.  Let go of the concept of precision.  Don't worry about how it looks--focus on whether it works.  Do what more and more people are doing, heck, what Bruce Lee recommended way back in the 60s...put on lots and lots of padding and safety equipment and make it real.

Embrace the chaos.



 



 

Recovery Report

Rory Miller's Blog - Sun, 2015-05-03 20:23
17 days post surgery. ACL replaced, meniscus trimmed. Doc looked around and decided to leave the LCL alone, for now. I've been walking without a brace (most times) for over a week, but don't tell my physical therapist. Strength and passive flexibility are coming back fast. Took myself off the heavy pain meds in less than a week. Ibuprofen now, and that's mostly to help the swelling.

Wes sent me a box of incredibly foul tasting Chinese herbs. No way to tell if they're helping for sure (I'd have to get the same injury again and not take the herbs and compare healing rates) but the PT says he's having trouble keeping up with my progress.

Weird thing with each new exercise-- it takes a moment of concentration the first time I do anything. Like a leg curl. There's a specific place in the back of my knee I had to remind how to move. Or maybe the zombie parts (doc said there was too much damage to replace with my own parts, so I had to use pieces of dead people) needed to get used to taking orders again. Once it was activated, no further problem.

The new repairs are fragile. I'm not supposed to test them. Not even supposed to ride a real bike for another three weeks or try to jog for three more months. That's frustrating, but it makes sense. And the bad things about knees is that you only really find the limits by breaking them. I guess that goes for a lot of things.

Near injury today-- The good leg slipped on the stairs and I reflexively kept myself from falling, by taking all of my falling weight on the bad knee. No pops or snaps or wet ripping noises, but the knee is letting me know it's not happy.

And the surgery is forcing me to rethink some things. Things I've put off thinking about.
Humans have expiration dates. Sometimes I feel like I'm well past mine. But there's some information I want to see spread while I'm still capable of demonstrating it (and can have fun brawling with the people who get it down.) The infighting stuff, mostly. Then the focus will have to switch to mental stuff-- commo, awareness, teaching...

I'm not useless, yet.

On the plus side, I'm getting a lot of writing done. The first draft of "Concepts" is finally finished and out to first readers.

Some stuff coming up that's exciting. Bad time to be injured, but the second iteration of the CRGI Instructor Development Course will be presented in London, Ontario next weekend. A class purely on how to teach emergency skills to adults.
 And  May 16-24 a 40-hour core dump in Edmonton, Alberta. It's something I've been wanting to do for awhile.
Information on both of those is here:
http://chirontraining.com/Site/Canada-May.html

And in June, I'll be team teaching with Tony Blauer. It will be the first time we've met in person. The Convergent Evolution seminar. Some information is here:
https://www.regonline.com/builder/site/Default.aspx?EventID=1703674

Mコミュみたいなサイト

Kris Wilder's Martial Secrets - Fri, 2015-05-01 02:50

男になろうと。「ちひろさん彼氏来ちゃったよ~やめよっか?」まなぶがペースを緩める。嫁は、俺が晩酌を長く続けることが多いので、時間が遅くなってもあまり気にしない。「あれ何っ??」って聞くと後輩はすごく慌ててました。すると今度はさっきよりも簡単に先っぽが入った。真っ暗闇とはいえ,彼の友達がいる部屋の中で私は全裸にされてしまったのです。」(いつも言います)M字開脚させてクンニしようとすると、女「シャワー浴びてないから、ダメですよぉ。さっきから電話が鳴っていますが全部ムシ。卑猥な女に変身させて欲しいな。友人Oもトイレに行った後、寝るようでした。その日はお互いに眠れなくて、夜中までメールをした。間違いない。特に、今同棲しているという彼氏(というよりもセックスフレンド)との変態セックスの話ばかりで、男がいない私はかなりうらやましく、そして、下半身がうずうずしてきます。へへ」って小首かしげてはにかむ愛。胸や男女の絡みを見ても同じwww。私もヌルヌルだったので、靖史君が少し入れる場所を探していましたが、すぐに入ってきました。理沙はホテルに入るなり私のパンツを下げ「今日はすっごくシタい気分なの」と言ってモノを口一杯に頬張りました。乳房の感触を感じながら乳首を探しあてました。そんな訳でAV鑑賞女子会したい。バカバカバカ!もう引き返せないじゃないかっ。「んっ・・・」と可愛い声が出る。『あっあっあっ…イイっ…もっと…はぁ~~~っイイっ…』俺は女の唇を吸った。私「あっ…ヤダ……」そういいながら、(あくまでも「やめてください!」的な態度で)私は男の人のおチンチンを握りました。」と、課長から爆弾発言。164cmで50kgぐらいとか言ってた。恥ずかしさはありましたが、セーラーの裾に両手をかけて、脱ぐ途中の、お腹がチラと見えるポーズで撮影されました。軽蔑している意味ではなく、プロ意識の高さにひたすら敬服していた。」「……どうして?」「だめ。体勢を変え、有希を仰向けにしてM字にさせパンツの上からまむこ辺りを舐めてみます。830名前:822[sage]投稿日:2005/07/16(土)17:25:58ID:Jmt8zU6n0翌日、酔いが覚めた所で話を聞いた。お風呂の時にされていたように、貴女が大きくて素敵な胸を自分で揉んでいる姿も、私にください。このあと抜かずに何度も中出しした。その先はもうグチョグチョに濡れている。

60代の熟女とセックス体験談

Kris Wilder's Martial Secrets - Fri, 2015-05-01 02:50

なんかその唇が子供っぽいのに妙にエロくみえる。ほら、タマももんでさしあげろ!いつもいってるだろう!」友人は、興奮してきて、彼女に命令し続ける。かおりは俺が射精してる間、ゆっくり、優しく俺のチンコを咥えてた。逆ギレかよ。だって、完全なギャルになっていたんですから!でも話してみると、昔の感じが残っていたんで安心しました。この言葉凄く好き。携帯にメールが一通。どうだあ。全然ぬれていないので、中に指をいれるのも苦労するほどしまっている。でも、傷心は癒えてないだろうし、今日はおっぱいだけ堪能したら、ほんとうに寝ようと誓った。隠してる両手を後輩は力任せにどかした。麻弥にも聞こえるようにわざといやらしい音を立てて舐めまくった。サッカーで鍛えたのかとても力が強く小柄な私の体はS君の胸の中にすっぽり収まりそう。俺が苦しんでた時、母さんは何をしてくれたっけ……「そうだ、佑香、熱冷ましの座薬入れてやろうか?」「……うん」思いつきを口にしたが、妹は素直にうなずいた。出す所だってのに絵里さんのいやらしいアナルは吸い込んできます」「吸い込んでなんかない。えりなは椅子に座る僕の後ろから、羽交い絞めするように抱きついてきたのだ。話が途切れた所で、手を握ってわざとらしく先生の目を見つめると、先生は目を潤ませながら見つめ返してきたのでいけると判断。まあ、寝取ってるのは俺のほうだけど…2回目で多少余裕があった俺は健気な愛香ちゃんの腰振りを楽しむ。乳首は感度がよく、ちょっと触るとすぐに硬くなった。トランクスを脱がしK先生のオチンチンを咥えました。今年はMちゃんがいないかわりにAさんがいる。」とか言ってたが、しだいに乳首が勃ってきて、「んっ、んっ」という声をあげ始めた。伸縮自在だろうけど、すげぇ~負けた気分になって悲しかった。前夜と同じように島崎君に明け方まで犯されても抵抗する気力も何も起こらない、体は感じても心は全く感じないセックスが終わるまで、ただじっとしている事しかできませんでした。あまり顔がきつく締まるので、お仕置きで舐めるのをストップします。吸ったり舐めたりの他にこすり付けたりするのも忘れずにぐりぐりと亀頭を刺激し手での手コキも忘れない。当然のように話しの内容はHな方向に振り切った状態です。弟のは大きくなってて、生き物みたいにぴくぴく動いてて、私も目がくぎ付けでした。「お前、気持ちよさそうに喘いでいたな、そんなに良かったのか?」「・・・・うん」私はやり場の無い怒りと、ママを抱けなかった悔しさと自分のすけべ心から出た報いだと悔やみました。

高齢者のセックス

Kris Wilder's Martial Secrets - Fri, 2015-05-01 02:50

うつむいたままの優子だったが微かに「あ・・・」吐息を漏らす。少女ナイフとセックスした。そこで、寝ているふりさえしとけば彼氏にも罪悪感無く気持ち良くなれると考えているはずだ!更に、後々責められても、気が付かなかったとか、先輩だったから言えなかったとか理由は色々付けられるし!つまり恵子の寝たふりに付合ってさえいれば何でも出来る!と言う事だ!僕は今度、指をマ○コに突っ込んで、Gスポットを刺激した!すぐに「グチュグチュグチュ」と大きな音が響きはじめて、恵子は腰を動かしまくっていた。「…ヤダ…そんなところお風呂に入ってからじゃないと…」私が少し抵抗すると、「いいって…平気だから…」と私の足を乱暴に開いて顔をうずめた。その際幸雄の顔の先には、嫁の股が見えた。冷蔵庫のスタミナドリンクも飲んでおく。なんのことなのか判らなかったのでSに問いただすと「Mさんが為替でしくじって借金を申し込んできたんだけど、返してもらえるアテがなさそうなので断ったんですけど」「なんでもするって泣いて頼まれたので、あきらめさせようと思って、会社の仲間の前でヌード鑑賞会するなら500万貸すといったら、やるというので・・・」悪い冗談かと思いましたし、いくらなんでもあの聡明で美人なMさんがそんなこととも思いました。このままイケなければ、すぐにマンネリがやってきて、セックスレスになってしまうのではないか」という不安でいっぱいになっていたみたいです。もちろん、俺の意思もあったが、パックリ開いた入口に2本の指が『ヌルッ』と、滑り込むように飲み込まれてしまった感じがした。ワレメは先ほどよりも濡れそぼっており、はちみつのような愛液がヘアーを伝って滴り、内ももの辺りも濡らしていました。だんだんと、チンポは元気を取り戻していくと葵の「もう一回しよ~」「もう一回したかったら、葵のオマンコにチンポ入れて下さいって言いな」と言うと、恥かしそうに「葵のオマンコにお兄ちゃんのオチンチン入れてください」二回戦目はバックから挿入しました。リカ「あ、あ、あ、イク!あ、あ、あ、イク!あ、あ、あ、イクぅ!遊ばないで!あ、またイクぅぅ!!」Y雄「ごめんごめん(笑)」指を抜き、再びナニを挿入し抱え上げ素早く駅弁の体制にするY雄。見事に偏見打ち砕かれたwwwそれからは目からウロコが落ちまくりで色んな作家さんを好きになった。Yは膣中でみごとイッてしまったようだ。

電話でセックス聞いてくれるサイト

Kris Wilder's Martial Secrets - Fri, 2015-05-01 02:50

かおりだった。髪は短くて、背が低くて、メガネで、黒髪で、仕事で失敗すると「きゃぅぅぅぅ~~」とか言う。「クチュクチュクチュ…」などすごい音がした。びっくりして彼の顔を見上げると、彼は一度手を離して両手で私の腰を引き寄せ、優しくキス…彼は舌で、私の舌を舐める。なんだか不思議な気分になります。車に乗ると、その駐車場はちょうど道路から死角になっていることに気づいた。乳首を軽く摘まれると、瞬く間に硬く尖ります。入れるたびにキュットアナルが締まる。優の中。それが妹の為にもなるのだと今は思っています。しばらく、彼女の上になったままじっとしていると、僕の萎えたペニスにピクッという様な膣の締まりが伝わってきました。「だめだって、汗臭いんだから」正直彼女の汗の匂いは心地良かったが、この状況からまた抱き締めるのは流石に躊躇われた。私ももう高校生、人並みにセックスには感心があります。とりあえず仕事の電話ではなさそうなのだがすぐに誰かは分からなかった。じゃあ、私で初体験だね」笑顔で俺を見つめる義妹は、さらに一生懸命俺を刺激してきた。俺はビラビラの外側を触れたか触れないかの程度でゆっくりなで始めた。「絶対、内緒に出来る?」耳元で義兄の声が聞こえた。「いいぞ。関係を続けている時は、夜会社で残業しているAさんに、送ってほしいという理由で呼び出され会社でのプレイなどもありとても楽しませてもらいました。小百合は部屋に入ってくるとベッドの縁に座った。号泣。この後は舐めても腰を引いて逃げるだけで、反応がほとんどありません。ただ、そんな男はろくでもないけどな。友達も学校に行ってるし何より恋愛したことのないやつばっかりで相談も何もできない。もしかしてこの子、すんごくエロいんでは。「ここを舐めてあげると言うと」「ハズカシイ…。私が誕生日に買ってあげたスカートで突っ込まれ、私が好きだといっていた下着で犯られていました。焦りのせいで、膣口にうまく当たらないし、腰が高すぎて角度が全然違ってた。「おぉ!こりゃでけぇな!」と言ってあいの胸の谷間に顔をうずめる友男。ね?」と、可愛くおねだりしてきてくれた。後日某駅で待ち合わせ。恵子はこっちを見て泣きそうな顔をしているが、僕はビデオのリモコンをチラつかせた。私が空想していた理想のギャル!「風呂のお湯が入ったばかりだから一緒に入ろう」アイが上着を脱ぐ。」なんて、まるで第三者的に思っていると義弟の指がまた乳首を転がし始めました。

闇サイト 掲示板

Kris Wilder's Martial Secrets - Fri, 2015-05-01 02:50

さすがに毎日はエロいメールはしなかったけど…休憩中にトイレでオナるのが日課になってしまった。抱きしめられて,胸を舐められるがままになるしかありませんでした。上司も無理やりは求めてこないので、私はただただ黙って受け入れていました。そして、濡れた指の先は、アヌスのすぽまりを押すように、何度か動きました。Fくんは手を伸ばし、私のクリを触り始めました。入れて!入れて!オマ○コに入れて!」「だめだよ・・・。翌日19日、朝11時に起床。ちなみに聖子は年齢が20歳顔はかわいいほうだと思う。芋の歳はいくつなんだ?まだ学生?公言できる関係ではないのだし、状況によってはいくら産みたいと言っても考える方針が違うと思うぞ。靖史君はジックリと凝視して、ビラビラを広げたり、グニグニいじったりと、好きに触っていました。エロあるみたいだしきついかもしれないw
でもエロ書くの苦手なんだよな…サイトに一作品しかないしそれも消してしまいたいくらいなんだけどムォ~~~なんなんだろう何がいけないんだろうやっぱりAVで肝心なシーン以外すっ飛ばして観てるそういう短気なところがいかんのだろうか
名前:佐藤美幸呼び方:みゆき呼ばれ方:みつ、みっつー?第一印象:元気な子、面白い笑今の印象:エロい、彼氏ラブ、怖がり好きな所:何かと面白い、エロの化身ひとこと:彼氏と末永くお幸せに!大人になれよ。ぶーちゃんあざとさ全振り過ぎる…。その間俺は服を脱ぎタオルを腰に巻いて待っていた。妻は逞しい佐々木の勃起で泣かされながら、俺のチ○コが劣っていることを訴える。A子の水色のパンツを見て歓声を上げる男たち。優しく脱がされた後は、愛のある胸を合わせてのセックスを楽しんでいた。
明日っつか今日は月末エロゲの日で朝からマップ前は行列だろうなぁ。義父「○○さん…でしたか?娘とはどうゆう…」俺「中学時代の同級生です!当時から仲良くしていて俺は寛子さんに惚れていました!久々に会って話して事情聞いたら気持ちが蘇ってきて我慢できず離婚を進め自分と結婚前提に一緒に住んで下さいと言いました!気持ちが蘇ってきたって言葉では寛子さんもお父様、お母様も不安だと思い結婚できない期間が寛子さんにはあるので本日同行させてもらい気持ちが本物だと知ってもらえるよう同棲の許可頂けるようお願いしに参りました。私はいつのまにか寝てしまってて、なんだかもそもそと体を触られている気がして目が覚めました。

関西熟女セフレ募集 掲示板

Kris Wilder's Martial Secrets - Fri, 2015-05-01 02:50

「なんですか?あたし何か悪い事しました?」先輩におそるおそる聞いてみた。腰から尻に回せた手に豊満な肉体を感じた。」「えっ!珍しい!いくいく!ちょっと待ってて!着替えなきゃ。←Yes!のときはわたしは光くんをガン見してます。ちょっと入っただけなのにまた、私のエロモードはスイッチオンになってて。そして、一世一代の賭けに勝った。純子は感じているばかりでもう抵抗はしていませんでした。でも、それが大きな間違いに発展してしまいました。奥様「ねぇ~お願いイカせて~お願いぃ~」と、声を出してます主人は、私にする様に、クリは舐めず、回りだけ。
おはよう?ギンギンビンビンとそそり立つ朝です。「ん・・・」ゆきねえの唇が押しつけられた刹那、舌がゆるりとボクの唇を割って入ってきた。今日、生理がきました。ベッドに横になり、キスした。中で指を動かすと、そのイボイボが指をず・ず・ず・ず・となで上げるように刺激して誠に具合が良さそうだ。自宅に着いたオレは1回しか抜けなかった事に後悔しつつ濡れたパンティーをずりネタにして2~3回位逝ってしまった。『じゃあ、入れるわよ。。そこらで我慢できずにいきそうになった為、俺が黙って腰を止めてると百合は恐らく自分が話す番だと思ったらしく。俺は自分の上半身も脱いで、素っ裸になると、妹のトレーナーとブラも取り払って全裸にした。この後はシャワーを浴びて、彩さん手作りのサンドイッチを食べたらまた営業、サラリーマンは辛いです。うちは狭いからね。昼12時半からは患者さんの御家族への説明だ。アソコ同士を擦り合わせ少し離すと奥さんの汁で糸を引いてすごくいやらしく感じた。それから、腕に注射を打たれました。ソファに手をつかせ、スカートをまくりあげて後ろからクンニした。なんでもスピード違反で捕まったので最新のレーダーを買いに来たとか。既にビショビショに濡れている彼女、でも、「シャワーを浴びさせて」と俺の体の下からスルリと抜け出しバスルームに入った彼女を待っている間が長かったこと・・・。私もヌルヌルだったので、靖史君が少し入れる場所を探していましたが、すぐに入ってきました。「ちょっちょちょっちょ…」私、テンパり気味。―なんというか、体はすごく気持ちいいんだけど…頭が感じてないというか…。足を折り曲げガードしていたと思います。お手洗いに行き用を足そうとパンツをおろした瞬間、ガチャっとドアが開きSさんが入ってきました。

長崎 人妻 エロ 出会い

Kris Wilder's Martial Secrets - Fri, 2015-05-01 02:50

「・・・ど、どういうつもり?」「フフフッ、びっくりした?」(な、なんだ冗談か・・・・)そのまま2人で色んな話をした。S:もしかして先輩もそういうことしたいという欲望はあるの?私に対しても?俺:ないといったらうそになる。Tさんが「どうだった?」といって手を握ってきました。実家を離れてひとり暮らしをしているちひろにとって、まなぶは数少ない昔を語り合える友人なんだなあくらいに思っていた。それからしばらくして、私は、元々料理人になる夢があって、今の会社の収入が半分になるのに、夢のために決意をしたときに、ヨーコと話す機会があった。俺は腰周り以外、泡塗れのままシャワーで妹を濡らすと、持っていたスポンジにボディーソープを継ぎ足すと、妹を洗い始めた。ね、舐めてあげる」「う、ん・・」と観念した様子。常に不安定。トイレに行って精子で汚れたトランクスをティッシュなどでふいて(トランクス+ハーパンだったので精子が布団にこぼれてなくてホントに助かった。あぁっ・・だめっ・・感じてしまうっ・・身体をこわばらせて,感じないように頑張るのですが,部長の指はそんな私をあざ笑うかのように感じるポイントをソフトに探り,刺激してくるのです。S君の手に導かれるままにキス、そして舌を絡めで・・・いつも間にか彼の手が私のパンティの中に「N江さんも濡れてるね、嬉しいよ」と言われたかどうかの内に彼の指が私の中に・・・「んはっ」・・・もう私は彼の為すがままです。なんなら朝からしとくか?笑』?『ばか!エロ臣!もお知らない!』と布団の中にもぐってしまう。妻は目を閉じじっと入って来るのを待ってましたがK君は位置が解らないようで焦っていました。乳も結構デカイ!ちょっと天然な不思議ちゃんの匂いがプンプン!どうやら里依紗ちゃんもアニヲタでその繋がりで知り合ったらしい。「あ~そろそろ出すから、中にたっぷり出してあげるからね」「・・・えっ・・・やっ・・・だめだよっ・・・」自分は男優のセリフに驚いて速水さんの方を見ました。
あたしがどんだけエロい声出すかまではわからないよね…///
風斗ぉぉぉ!!!エロい!!!うわぁぁぁぁ!!!
結論。俺は再び、「そんなことないですよ」と言い続けた。住む世界が違うって思っていましたし、少し憧れはあったけど、『そんな世界に憧れるのなんて子供っぽい!』って勝手に押さえ付けていました。スリーサイズを測り終えてその結果を知ると、特にウエストが春よりも2センチ程、細くなった事を異常に喜んでいた。

都合のいい女 募集

Kris Wilder's Martial Secrets - Fri, 2015-05-01 02:50

軽率にエロ、ていう言葉が最近好きなんだけど、だからどうしたんだ、書いたんか、見たんか、読みたいんか、なんなんや、と思って我にかえる。一足先に風呂を上がりベットでアイを待つ。」彩「(ジュルッ・・・フムッ・・・)」何度も首を振りながらフェラをやめない彩さん。そして時間が過ぎた頃、「この後の予定は?」などと探るように聞いてみた。濡れているが、さすがに若いだけあってオマンコは狭い。狭い車の中、助手席を倒して義妹を寝かせ、おもむろに胸を吸いだします。だから終わっても独りにしないで」
わりと中学生とセックスしたいプールでいきなり一目惚れですとか言えばいけそう
CMで「いわゆるセックスレス?」とか流すのやめて??
まじもるもいさん?ぐうう;;;しあわせすぎるでしょうなんですかそれ;;;;;;珍しくセックスしないこよいさこよってほんと尊くなっちゃってだめですね…いさなは今宵くんが喜ぶなら料理もちゃんと練習しますしだんだん作れなかった料理が作れるようになりますね結婚しよ
男が久しぶりに女の子に連絡するって事は大体、「俺とセックスしようぜ」って意味
セックスの音がデカすぎて壁ドンどころか通報されたからな。これで少しは寒さが凌げることが出来た。島崎君は私のアソコを無理矢理こじ開けようとして指先を動かしました。とてつもなくつまらない席でした。この頃には完全に心身ともリラックスしてしまって、日頃の肩こりや腰痛も吹き飛んでしまったようです。当日、ホテルのロビーで待ち合わせ、鉄板焼きのお店へ連れて行っていただき美味しいお酒とお肉で大満足させてもらいました。すると向こうから「イク、あああああ、イク、ああああ、でっかいの、イク、ああああ、イクううううう」って声が聞こえたと思ったら「ズボッ」って抜けてしまいました。よく近親相姦的なことは無いのかと聞かれるがそんなもんあるかいなと答える。早速懐かしさも合せて電話する事にしました。そのうちプレハブの現場事務所がアパート隣の空き地に建てられ、それまで仮事務所としていたアパートは社員用宿泊所兼宴会場となった。気づかなくてごめん。二人とも童顔でやせっぽちなんで、よく言えば若く見える、悪く言えばガキっぽい。笑そんなん言うたらこのやりとり何回してるか分からへんけど、刺されるべきは私やから!!
ひょえ?!わああありがとうございます色んな準備の合間に描いてるので、がががががんばりますエロさとか微塵もない新婚なのですけれど…!!あ、灰賀さんの所に置かせてもらう予定です…!
(°_°)??僕からグロなエロを抜いたらただの雄になるから…やめられない止まらない?
くそwwww下バーのエロサイトの広告が永遠ついてくるwwwwww生意気な女子が穴に挟まってたのでなぜそうなったし
どんなツイートでも人それぞれの個性的があるやん?でもさ、エロい系はやめよーや刺激的なやつもしかも乗っけてるエロい写真の女の子ほとんどブスやしな、朝とか見たら朝飯に悪い
やっぱり村中城の半壊イラストが抜群にエロいな。

逮捕されるか心配 プチ援交

Kris Wilder's Martial Secrets - Fri, 2015-05-01 02:50

Sの母親は、他の生徒の母親と比べても若々しく(実際35歳)、とても中3の子供がいるようには見えません。それがうれしくてたまらず、俺は「○○○、愛してるよ」と、ついに感情を言葉に出して応えてしまった。でもセリナはいつもと変わらない感じであらわれた。私は恐怖を感じた。湯船ではまたフェラチオをしてくれて、これがまた丁寧で気持ちが良い。義弟よりも細かったですが長い感じでした。「美加は感じやすくイキやすいんだね」「だってサブローさん上手なんだもん。ベッドに座り頭をなでているところを撮影しようということで俺が座るとベッドに押し倒されて…。そして当時の彼女とはじめてのセックス。まっすぐな子なんでそのことを凄く後悔してて、杏「ねぇ孝どうしよう」って泣いてました。行為が終わったあと、しばらく放心状態で、正直に「こんなの初めて」って漏らしたら、髪の毛をクシャクシャに撫でられました。距離は遠かった。「兄さん、今度は私と気持ちよくなろっ!」義妹が壁に手をついてお尻をこちらに向ける。相当気持ち良かったみたいで、最後は俺の頭を掴んでグリグリ押し当てながらイッたみたい。「私はお盆過ぎに結婚する予定です。直に胸を愛撫された私は完全に感じてしまい、恥ずかしくて下を向いて唇を噛み快感に耐えました。?先日近所で仲の良い夫婦3組で、長野に温泉旅行へ行った。私のように殴られるだけ。(←この後お約束の水没あり)髪を洗っていると、いつ入ってきたのか、彼女が背中に抱きついてきた。その時点でストッキングの上からでも分る程に湿り気がいっぱいです。」「あんなに早いと、本番使えませんよw」「まぁ、今回は見てるだけでよく我慢したから、次は俺くんも参加して楽しみましょ!」と言って、今回はお開きとなった。懐かしくて、うれしくって、私も少し飲んで楽しかった。直後に、彼氏とは別れました。」Mちゃん「Y君いいよ。ホテルは複数あるのだし、平日の昼だという事実も考えれば、一発で部屋には入れるだろう、と、楽観視していた。安いと、すぐ買えるし、それが安心になるし、パフェなくなってもまた買うことは出来るし何をいいたいかというとイベントのときにURだった推しキャラがランキングで戦争すぎて1日で諦めたエロミン「ランキングUR取れなくても心はお前だけだよ」
エロいかどうかはわからんけど、知り合いの保育士は常に発情してる。「3ラウンド目」加奈先輩は、またさっきと同じようにペニス全体を口に含み激しく上下させてます。

逆援助電話番号

Kris Wilder's Martial Secrets - Fri, 2015-05-01 02:50

きっと、また一人で果てたんでしょうorzそんな、ダメダメな私を抱きあげ座らせて「ベロ出して」と言われました。自分が裸だと気が付くと凄い勢いで布団を引き寄せて隠していました。帰りの路線も一緒だったんで駅まで俺の腕にしがみついてたたまーに当たるおぱーいの感触が俺の性欲を掻き立てが我慢俺は終点の駅まで、まきちゃんは4つ前の駅まで電車の心地よい揺れに負けてウトウトまきちゃんの降りる駅に着いたので寝てたまきちゃんを起こして、またねと声を掛けて眠りに着く暫くして終点、俺の降りる駅に着く眠いと思いながら立ち上がると何故か横にまきちゃんが座って寝てるあれ?デジャヴ?と思いながら声を掛ける電車を降りるとふらふらしながら「降りようとしたらドアしまっちゃいました」と、少し気持ち悪そうに笑ってた駅を出てすぐのコンビニで水などを買う、まきちゃんに手渡すと美味しそうに飲んでるのを見て発情してしまった腕にしがみついてふらふら歩くまきちゃんを連れて部屋に玄関を開けると廊下に転がりこむまきちゃんの靴を脱がせて部屋まで引っ張って連れていくまだ少し気持ちが悪そうなのでベッドを背もたれにした状態でコンビニ袋から水を取り出し飲ませるコキュコキュと音はするものの少し口からこぼれてしまうそれを見て衝動にかられて唇を奪ってしまった南アル〇ス天然水の味がしたかどうかさだかではないが、少し澄んだ味がした口から水が滴った跡を舌でなぞる唇からアゴそして首少し驚いた顔を見せ、薄目に俺の行動を観察してるようだった首にキスをすると鈍く体をのけぞらせる耳の側まで移動すると「あっ」と小さな声がしたが構わず舌を使って耳で遊ぶ更にのけぞるので左手で抱き寄せてキス舌を入れてみるとまきちゃんも小さく動く。どうやら、私を見た後ひとりでしてるって。首を舐められて、感じる自分が居ました。Yさんは脚をブルッと震わせます。「いく!彩様もういっちゃう!」「いいわよ、今日はご褒美でそのままいきなさい」「はい」OLスーツのストッキングを撫でながら思いっきり中にぶちまける。いたずらっぽく笑う妹にキスをして、首や耳を舐め回し、俺も妹の肩をチュっと吸ってキスマークをつけ返した。とりあえず男三人で本当に見えるのか行ってみると、本気で見えてしまった!同期の女の子5人くらいいて、湯船に入ってるのが三人で体を洗ってるのが2人。「歩美さん、いくよ!」引き抜いて口に持ってこうとするけど間に合わずアゴ下から唇にかけて顔射。

New Ground

Rory Miller's Blog - Thu, 2015-04-23 16:34
Kasey made the cover of Police Magazine. He posted one of the interior pictures on FB with this caption:
"Here is the April 2015 issue of Police Magazine
Randy the business Sensei will be pleased to see the product placement of the One on One Control Tactics - O3CTlogo in a national publication. Also if you look close you can see a flag for Allegiance Fitness in the back ground. And I'm sure Rory Miller will recognize the Chiron Training weapon retention being demonstrated. #represent"
The shout-out is appreciated. And the CDT program (Chiron Defensive Tactics) is a good jumping-off point to something else.

The weapon retention part is good. I want to say it's the best out there and there's nothing else like it, but that's probably not true anymore. Enough people have been exposed to the idea, and been pleased with it, that it has and will spread. And there's always convergent evolution-- many different ways to get to something that works, and many of the things that work will be very similar.

The thing that's important in my head right now, though, is an aspect of permission. Under what circumstances do people and organizations give themselves permission to change? Refusal to adapt is a death knell. But change, especially organizational change, is hard. ConCom explains why...  but there's still a lot of work to do in how to change despite the difficulty.

Incremental improvement, building off of previous foundation is change, but it is very limited. As Dabrowski pointed out (Hat tip to Ann Craig) big personal growth involves a dissolution, a complete destruction and rebuilding of the person you were before. Big growth in a system would require dismantling the system and starting over.

You can get better by continuing to build on your foundation, with diminishing returns, but you have to dismantle them to get paradigm shifting change. And, of course, this level of change is seen as ego or identity destruction and is fought fiercely. ( I know I'm having a good thinking morning when I reheat the coffee four times and keep forgetting to drink it.)

So-- what gave MCSO the internal permission to give us the permission to change our weapon retention? I don't know the absolute answer, but I do know some of the pieces.

  • We cared. The people who needed this weren't some abstract "customer" they were people we worked with and cared about. Friends and colleagues. I think this is important personally, but it was true before change was allowed, so it wasn't the key.
  • We had a different demographic. Thirty or forty years ago, a big part of officer selection was simply size. (And who you knew.) They wanted big men and that was mostly what they hired. If you're teaching (like many military-based systems) 18-20 year-old men in the best shape of their lives, full of ego and testosterone, you can teach them almost any crap and they will make it work. Times change. In trying to make the profession gender and age neutral, there was a definite shift in physical abilities of the average officer. More importantly, there was a much wider range of physical abilities. You could no longer teach crap and expect a former high school linebacker to rely on strength to make it work. But that's not the reason either, because one of the things a modern bureaucracy requires is slavish lip-service to the patently untrue ideal that "all people are the same."
  • The techniques taught at the academy and by my agency simply didn't work. That right there should have been enough... but it wasn't. What they were teaching was measurable: the stereotypical eight-step wristlock takedown to prone cuffing never worked, but it gave you eight easily measurable steps on which to pass or fail a student.
  • People got hurt when things didn't work. Again, that should have been reason enough. But it wasn't. Not until we had a year with so many injuries that people got alarmed. Really alarmed, as in the union was looking into it. Understand that injuries came out of a different budget, it was state workman's comp. But lawsuits came out of the agency's budget. ---And another thing. When things are rare, like shootings, it is often easier to categorize failure as a "fluke" rather than entertain the possibility that you are doing things systematically wrong. Lots of people rationalize away problems until it is too late.
  • I think this was the key. It was the stupidest, most minor of details. We were teaching the academy-approved weapon retention curriculum for a gun grab from behind-- use your weapon hand to pin the weapon in the holster and turn to your non-weapon side to move the gun out of reach... and realized that the turn gave up the third level of retention for our modern type III holsters. We had not changed or seriously looked at our training methods on this subject since before we switched to semis. What we were teaching was actively wrong for the equipment we carried.
All of the other stuff mattered. People cared. But it took something to blame that didn't tie to people or policy to get the permission.
Just one example, and I know it's incomplete. But if you want to break new ground you need to reject old ground. Not out of ego. As a rule you don't change things that work, especially if you're doing it just so you can be in charge.
And there's a method to deconstructing the old practices so that what you build is stronger. It's not, or shouldn't be, just a childish rejection out of pique or spite.
This is already getting too long. Do you or does your organization need to change? If so, what will be required to give that kind of permission?

Packs

Rory Miller's Blog - Sun, 2015-04-19 20:53
Just...wow. Off a plane, home for 26 hours, on the road, home for twelve hours and on a plane, then home for less than nine and on a plane again. And something is happening to my internal wiring, because (so far) I don't appear to be burning out on people. This is more exhilarating than exhausting. We'll see if that keeps up.

And the to-do list is somewhere between ambitious and overwhelming. Especially the writing section. And it's imperative to fight the paralysis that comes with having an excess of worthy goals. Things to do, things to do...

So let's make this quick.

Very few things are zero sum games. Outside of artificially imposed stuff (like the rules in a game. There are only sixteen chess pieces per side, only so many pieces of property in Monopoly) the only truly non-zero sums I can think of are space (literally the surface of the earth) and chemical elements, like Fe, iron. And exposed to human creativity, even those can be tweaked. There are only so many acres in Manhattan, but a skyscraper vastly increases the useable acreage by thinking in three dimensions. Money may have been a zero-sum game when we were on the gold or silver standard (although even then, it was never limited to one metal) but it certainly isn't now, and wealth never has been zero-sum.

Power, absolutely is not zero-sum. Increasing your intelligence does not decrease mine. Becoming more creative will not make me less creative. Your reps in the gym do not prevent me from doing my own reps (ooooh, though-- waiting in line for a squat rack is a zero-sum game. Limited resource of a specific object...until you apply human creativity and go outside and lift rocks.)

Power does have the effect of making other people who want to use power to coerce think. Coercion over powerless people has zero consequences. Coercion over powerful people is always risky. And thus evil people want to be surrounded by all the weak people possible. And they will claim that others getting strong is weakening them.

And look at the mechanics of that one very carefully. Because te other side is to claim that weakening the strong somehow, magically, strengthens the weak.

From a conversation with Anna Valdisseri when we talked in Sheffield. (I like the way she thinks, that's one of my highest compliments.) She had a unique way of looking at it. As best I can paraphrase:
Humans live in groups. We're social animals. When we see ourselves as pack animals we know that becoming more powerful as individuals makes the pack stronger. It's better for everyone. When we see ourselves as herd animals, we want all the other members to be weak because it increases our chances. If everyone is weak, the wolf will get someone else.

When something bad happens and hits the news, is your instinct to learn more and train harder so that you have options if it should ever happen around you? I started carrying regularly after the Luby's shooting in Texas because I realized I could not have contributed unarmed. If your instinct is to randomly disempower the people around you when bad things happen, that's a herd mentality.


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Actually wrote this three weeks ago but stumbled on an internal monkey brain problem in the middle. Took a while to work it out.

On Power

Rory Miller's Blog - Wed, 2015-03-18 00:33
Maija asked the right question. Always best to define your terms. I think "strong" and 'weak" are false sorts, and forgive me for not being clear.

This whole line of thought got launched because Dr. Tammy Yard-McCracken started a dialogue about power dynamics in teaching-- and the can of worms got a whole lot bigger than either of us expected. I really don't know where that project is going. It could be a book or a class or something unexpected. But so far, just in the questions, the collaboration looks promising.

Power isn't an endstate. There are no weak or strong people, just people at different places on a given continuum. And power is not linear. I am stronger than K, but she is smarter and more artistic than I am. R has more money, but J has more skills. Q can access a deep level of viciousness, but W can access an equally deep level of empathy. Power is not a scale but a net of ever-interconnecting methods of affecting the world. And in each strand of the net, you have attributes and skills that both affect the strength.

But in the end, it is about ability to affect the world and, at least equally and maybe more: an ability to have choice in how much the world affects you.

And so when I say "strong" or "weak" in this case, it has nothing to do with where you are on this scale. It has everything to do with which direction you are moving in. Because you are either getting better, or you are getting worse. If you don't get stronger, you will stagnate and get weaker. You can't rest on this. And that "can't' isn't meant as an admonition, but as a simple statement of fact.

If you are getting better, you are strong. Maybe not as strong as you want or you could be. Certainly not the strongest in the world. But the very act of seeking to be better, to be able to affect the world more, is strength.
And, conversely, if you are not striving to be better, you have accepted entropy and you are weak. Doesn't matter if you have the genetics to be a world power lifter. Doesn't matter if you inherited wealth and political power. Doesn't matter what you tell yourself so that you can sleep at night. If you aren't striving to be better you are, by my definition weak. Sorry.

And there's another dynamic here, because power is only a small part of it. You are already powerful. You have a brain bigger than our ancient ancestors. If you have a decent diet you are likely much bigger. You have better communication skills. You have access to information your ancestors could never dream. And your ancestors conquered the world. With half of your gifts, with nothing much beyond rudimentary communication skills and opposable thumbs, your ancestors became the apex predator of this planet. Do you get that? You are fucking mighty.

That is your birthright. That is who you are. And no animal naturally weakens itself. Tigers never starve themselves to look better to other tigers. Snakes don't slither over coals to show their bravery.

So the second dimension is not just power, but comfort with power. If you have a working brain and a decent amount of mobility, anyone on this planet could assassinate anyone else. I may be stronger than K, but she is comfortable enough with the strength and skill that she has that she has no doubt she could make me pay. People who are comfortable with power have to be respected.

There's a huge amount here that Tammy and I are slowly working on-- the ethical element, toxic relationships to power, whether power can be given or must be taken-- a ton of stuff. But I think the bones lie in these two things:
Power is about growth or stagnation.
Comfort with power is required to use it.

Just a Few Thoughts

Rory Miller's Blog - Thu, 2015-03-12 20:15
It looks like we might be on business stuff for a bit. And there will be some teaching stuff, too.
The blog is my place for thinking out loud. That was easier when it was the anonymous meanderings of  some random jail guard poking at internal stuff. The biggest mystery and challenge in my life right now is the business end. I want to get good at it because I hate being bad at anything. And I must do it without compromising my principles. So far, no problem.

This will be kind of random. I may not publish it (I already have several posts written that I'll never publish-- some too dark, some too personal). I may take each paragraph and expand it into a post. I don't know yet.

Thought One:
In this discussion, there is a cross-over to another project I'm working on. We have all been systematically lied to. There is a belief that is so common it is considered axiomatic, but I believe it started as a deliberate lie with a deliberate purpose:
"Power tends to corrupt, and absolute power corrupts absolutely."-- Lord Acton (titled, landed, seat in parliament...)
What better way to keep good people powerless than to tell them they will become bad people if they gain power? And it has the effect of a self-fulfilling prophecy because once the edict is taken to heart, only people who are already bad seek power. So we see corrupt people in positions of power and assume that the power made them that way.
It's a lie. A systematic lie woven into the fabric of society for the express purpose of keeping good people from ever being strong enough to challenge those in power. If you believe this (and I did for years, an assumption so deep I never even considered challenging it) you have been brainwashed. And the brainwashing has made you a servant to your enemy.

Thought Two:
This is coming up in the discussion. Mac made a comment on the last post that earning a living and getting good enough to teach are both full time endeavors, and that made it hard to do both. The math doesn't work for that. You have to make a living anyway, why does a career at the Sheriff's Office not make it just as hard to do both? When we have arguments we can show to be mathematically false, what are we really arguing for? I think we are driven to preserve our own brainwashing.
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And, aside-- I do need to make a living, and I really only had two marketable skills when I came back from Iraq. But money is not how I keep score. I started teaching JJ because there was no one nearby who could play the games I wanted to play at the level I wanted to play them. I was creating my own playmates. My current goal: Weak people annoy me. They whine and complain and play bullshit little political games (and the loud blustery ones, whatever they tell themselves, are in the weak camp as well.) If I can't find enough strong people, it's up to me to make them. And that's probably more than you wanted to know about my inner motivations.
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Thought Three:
I'm doing everything wrong and it's working.
No advertising. Only social media is FB and that's still a personal page. I don't send out e-mail blasts. For that matter, I just have a few regional e-mail lists and people have to ask to be put on it. I don't list the agencies or special groups I've worked for. For the first three years I charged for a whole weekend what a few others in this field charge per person for a weekend. (Not quite true anymore-- it would be for the cost of about two people.) And there are very few openings left on my schedule this year, and it was almost full before I even opened it...

Thought Four:
That implies there are some universal principles that work, that go deeper than just common business wisdom. Not sure what they are, but I have a pretty good idea what works for me.



Keep it fun!

John Titchen's Blog - Tue, 2015-03-10 15:48

Training in the martial arts can be a serious business.

  • Physical Fitness
  • Personal Discipline
  • Improved Concentration
  • Competition
  • Self Defence

Listing the most common reasons why adults and children join or study a martial art, they all appear to be serious. Despite all the rewards that they bring, training in the martial arts can be difficult, demanding, frustrating and even painful. The rewards themselves are bestowed so incrementally that they are often unnoticed by the practitioner and this can have a detrimental effect on motivation.

The crux of the matter is that if we aren’t enjoying the training then it is hard to stay motivated to continue. The destination will not be reached if the route isn’t travelled, and the act of travelling itself has to be fun. It really is the journey and not the destination that is important.

Skill development requires repetition. It’s easy for that to become routine and boring and I am sure that like many other instructors I have lost students in the past because I failed to utilise enough variety to disguise that repetition in ways that maintained the sense of excitement and fun.

We expect training to stretch us, to be demanding, to be tiring. Even when it is all those things we should also normally expect to leave training with a smile on our face, but not the smile of someone who feels pleased through the self -denial of a diet or having eaten something ‘healthy’ rather than a treat they wanted. We should leave with the smile of a person that has had fun, because no matter how worthy the ‘end goals’ it is the enjoyment of a class that will draw us back to each new lesson and ensure our progress.

There are many different approaches that can help to keep each lesson fresh and fun:

  • training at different speeds
  • trying different combinations
  • setting different challenges
  • playing stimulus games to improve tactile, visual or auditory response time
  • applying techniques in different ways
  • pairing with different people
  • mixing up the order of the class
  • identifying and reinforcing strengths.

There are many reasons why I train and teach, there are SMART goals that I have set myself and my students, but the thing that draws me to each class is that I want to enjoy myself and have fun.

The destination keeps changing, but I’m here for the fun of the journey.


More Business Stuff

Rory Miller's Blog - Mon, 2015-03-09 19:19
The last post hit some people a little hard. Got some conversations going in my e-mail and on facebook. So a little more thinking out loud here.

It offends me that there are some extraordinary martial arts masters (and master is a word I do not use lightly) who, in their old age, are living in poverty or on the edge. Pioneers in bringing thriving traditional systems to the states or Europe, people who started the entire Reality-Based Self defense movement. And they're living in shitholes, not even surviving on a pension because they were too busy following their passion to create a pension in the first place. It offends me. Maybe you know some of the people I'm talking about, maybe you don't, and maybe you know a few I've never met. But whether you know it or not, no matter what your lineage is, there is probably someone living in a crappy trailer park that you owe a huge debt to.

Part of what bothers me is that in many cases, it was preventable. It shouldn't have happened. A tragedy is when the flaws in the hero of a story spawn an inevitable demise. So it is here, and in almost all cases, the flaw was pride. And I'm subject to it just as much and in exactly the same way.

If you came up through the traditional Japanese arts as I did, you were probably pounded with the antipathy between the samurai class and the merchant class. Are you from that culture or that era? Hell no. But you probably absorbed the ethic that "fighters are above money." It will be compounded if you were raised poor in America, since one of the mechanisms society applies to keep people poor and powerless is to tell them the lies that only bad people make money and that power corrupts. (What better way to keep good people powerless than to tell them that gaining power will turn them into bad people?)

Caught in this belief, many of the best fighters and teachers deliberately work to be failures at the business side to preserve an ethic designed to keep them weak. In doing so, they serve their own enemies and ensure their own defeat.

Fighters are one thing. When you are ready to become a teacher you should be at least a step beyond that. You must be, at minimum, a strategist. Would any good strategist deliberately refuse to learn the way a new battlefield works? Would a good swordsman faced with guns not learn about guns? He would only refuse if he was stupid, or too proud.

And that's the first reframe, and probably the most critical. Use the pride: If the merchants are a lower class, are you going to lose at their game? Hell no. But in order to win, you have to learn the new rules. So what are you? A mere fighter who can't see beyond a single opponent? Or a true strategist?

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