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Jason Lester
Jason Lester's picture
Never turn your back

Hi everyone, and a very happy new year to all

16 years ago when i was 15 years old i took a beating off three youths (or as we call them today,hoodies) Here i recall that night when visiting a friend on a rather rough estate. It was a friday or saturday night around 9.00pm, cannot remember for sure. Anyway my friend and i had been to the local shop to buy some cigarettes (being 15 i thought smoking was cool) we had walked down the road and stopped by a phone box near the kids park to enjoy our purchase, no sooner had we stopped three youths came across from the park asking for a cigarette, i lied and said i did not smoke, upon this one youth called me a liar as he had seen me buy them from the shop. I still continued to lie and told them i didnt want any trouble, with this i turned and went to walk away, as i did this i was struck hard in the back of the head ( by a punch i guess) and what i can only descibe as a white film covered both my eyes which for maybe 30 to 40 seconds made me blind in both eyes, naturally i was scared and fought back by swinging punches hoping for the best while being swung about, kicked,punched and spat upon and being blind for those short seconds. My so called friend did nothng but watch as i took the beating, the whole event lasted but a minute or tWo if that,  they either give up or i managed to escape i really cannot remember but i do remember running down the hill to safety (catch the bus home) covered in blood and bodily fluids.

So my first and last ever (touch wood)lol,beating, i remember for sure not going to the ground, lucky for me, the injurys i substained were two black eyes, swollen cheek bone, bruised ribs and i good telling off from my mum,lol.

So who was at  fault, myself for lying and turning my back? or them for the cowardly attack? Either way i had learned a very valuable lesson, never ever turn your back in any confrontation.

It was a few weeks later i saw the youths in town and not one to be beat (or ever learn) i confronted all three, harsh words were exchanged and it very nearly kicked off again but was broken up by a passing police officer, once separted i never saw them again even to this day, its been 16 years but that event in my life still angers me inside for being so stupid, turning my back when really i knew better and taking a beating for something so silly as a cigeratte.

Walking away is the best way as much as it may anger you inside, no one likes defeat even if it may be through words exchanged, when i was younger it was a case of hit first asked questions later, and although im older (lost my hair,teeth and looks,if i ever had any!) and wiser so to speak and a professional teacher that part of me still lingers inside. But when angry or upset now i take a few deep breathes and remember this saying:

                                                                   First learn how to heal, to hurt someone is easy

Somteimes its never that easy but hey, we are only human after all.

All the best,

Jason

Tau
Tau's picture

Interesting.

Yes, never turn your back.

What would have been the harm in letting them have a cigarette (a strange question from me when I openly think smokers should all be locked up)? Would you have perhaps gained a pleasent conversation there?

Lee Richardson
Lee Richardson's picture

Tau wrote:

Interesting.

Yes, never turn your back.

What would have been the harm in letting them have a cigarette (a strange question from me when I openly think smokers should all be locked up)? Would you have perhaps gained a pleasent conversation there?

Tau, I'm not sure if you were kidding or not, so apologies if you were and I've had a sense of humour failure, but assuming you were serious - three youths hanging around in a park probably aren't hoping for a spot of witty repartee with passers-by. Asking for a cigarette from a stranger is a classic and much used interview technique and Jason's response was the only possible response. His failing was unsighting himself by turning away.

Tau
Tau's picture

Lee Richardson wrote:
assuming you were serious - three youths hanging around in a park probably aren't hoping for a spot of witty repartee with passers-by. Asking for a cigarette from a stranger is a classic and much used interview technique and Jason's response was the only possible response. His failing was unsighting himself by turning away.

I was serious. I was questioning, although not critcising as I wasn't there, if perhaps it was an over-reaction to assume negative intent. Evidently it wasn't and I'm not suggesting not maintaining a high level of alertness and considering the possibility of it being an interview, considering escape options etc. But still, one way or another the interview had begun. I just wonder if it could have been avoided by not automatically assuming the worst.

Lee Richardson
Lee Richardson's picture

Tau wrote:

I just wonder if it could have been avoided by not automatically assuming the worst.

I suppose you'd have to be there, but it'd have certainly have set my Spidey senses tingling. Maybe I'm just a cantankerous old bleeder, but I make it a point never to have the right time, know where the nearest taxi rank/bus or train station is etc whenever I'm asked. I'm not rude with it, just firm.

Stuart
Stuart's picture

Lee Richardson wrote:

Tau wrote:

Interesting.

Yes, never turn your back.

What would have been the harm in letting them have a cigarette (a strange question from me when I openly think smokers should all be locked up)? Would you have perhaps gained a pleasent conversation there?

Tau, I'm not sure if you were kidding or not, so apologies if you were and I've had a sense of humour failure, but assuming you were serious - three youths hanging around in a park probably aren't hoping for a spot of witty repartee with passers-by. Asking for a cigarette from a stranger is a classic and much used interview technique and Jason's response was the only possible response. His failing was unsighting himself by turning away.

Yes, a true classic engagement technique - even had it tried on me. I was sitting on a park bench and three lads came over - they could not have looked more dodgy if they'd tried. Got the "Here mate got a fag?" . "No, sorry I don't smoke," I replied. They tried a few other things and there was a definite undertone of threat but in the end they were unsettled enough to move on.